Tomorrow is moving day. Feeling a little sad, in a sentimental kind of way. Its rare, but this feeling always shows up when I move. Normally, I'm the kind of person who loves change. Even in this situation, when I would rather stay than go, I can't help but be excited for the change. I love moving for that reason. I know its weird. I'm pretty sure its genetic, passed on to me from my Granddad. But on moving day I always get a little nostalgic, a little sad to leave behind my life in this place. Once I get on the road, the feelings will fade. One thing I have learned over the years is to embrace feelings in the moment, so indulge me while I journal this.
Erin Fun Fact: I LOVE making lists. Love it. It brings me joy and relieves anxiety. It calms me down and get me excited all at once. Its like Diet Coke, but without the subsequent gas and bloating. Right now as I type this, I can see no less than 8 lists that are magneted (its a word now) to the fridge, and I know of several more sprinkled throughout the house. Thus...
Things I won't miss about living here:
1. The Santa Ana winds
2. The ____________ (fill in the expletive) 91 freeway
3. HOT, DRY summers
4. Traffic at every hour, every day (see #2 above)
5. Living without my husband
Things I will miss about living here:
1. Cheap pedicures
2. Disneyland
3. Wearing sandals year round
4. The lovely beaches where one can wear a swimming suit, and even get in the water, if one wanted to
5. Multiple political points of view
6. Sunshine
7. Affordable housing
8. Wide parking stalls
9. Strong church presence
10. Wonderful, loving, supportive family and friends
Yeah, I'm going to miss this place terribly. Don't get me wrong, I am excited to move up north. I really am. I mean, I still have my reservations, but overall, I am feeling excited and positive. I'm looking forward to what the future holds for me and for my family. I know that the Lord has guided us to the place where we are at this time. I have faith that He has a plan for us. It has been a bumpy road, and MANY times along the way, we've looked at each other and said "what have we done?! We just can't do this anymore!" But that's what trials of faith are all about: trusting in the Lord, seeking his guidance, acting on answers to prayer, taking leaps into the darkness. Not that I think the road is going to be smooth from here on out, I know it won't be. Our journey is far from over. But I know we are being guided, our hands are being held, and I am grateful for that.
So here I am, scared but full of hope. And dreading the 9 hour car trip tomorrow with the boys... :)
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5 comments:
good luck! and you'll do great. what a good attitude you have. love you!!
Oh great, now I want to move!
Yeah, I totally get you. The promise of something better and exciting and different around the corner can stave off even the toughest sentimentality.
I am thoroughly vicariously thrilled for you.
PS A little Dramamine goes a loooong way. Like an eighth of a tablet for Ava. So maybe 1/32 for your scrawny little tree frog. Had to find that out when we were trying to keep her from barfing on the way to Thanksgiving. The side effects are, you know, a bonus...
Good luck with the move, chickadee!
You forgot Miguel's Jr!!!!!
You are so strong. I know your kids will appreciate everything their parents have done and will do for them. I always find strength from reading your posts.
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