Oh My Micah (A Love Story)

I'm feeling like a boring blogger lately. Not much of relevance going on here. No job changes, childbirths, moves, death, destruction, or famine to report. Which means I'll talk about the boys. Actually, just Micah. Micah had his 4 month check up today. 14 pounds, 25 1/2 inches. Getting skinnier. I had high hopes for him, starting off so average, but it looks like he is heading in the same direction as his brother. Tall. Skinny. XL head.

I'm just starting to get to know Micah. I was talking to another new mom the other day, explaining our family's situation over the last year, and how we ended up here, and it got me thinking. I was kind of in a daze until just a few weeks ago. Right after Micah was born, the crazy hormones and recovery from delivery had me weepy, depressed, and overwhelmed. Just as that started to subside, Jake was transferred here, I became a single mom again, and Micah started his 3 month tour of Scream-Fest 2009. Colicky babies have a way of sucking the life out of everyone within earshot. I think I cried as much as Micah. And then we had to move. And the weepy, depressed and overwhelmed continued. I was barely keeping it together. You know how in swimming, when you have to hold a brick over your head and tread water for 10 minutes? I felt like that, only someone kept adding bricks to my load. And the water I was swimming in was the Sea of Depression and Anxiety. I felt like at any moment my legs were going to give out and I was going to get sucked in. I didn't particularly want to add post-partum depression to my list of Crap I Don't Want To Deal With Right Now, But I Have To Anyway, so I kept fighting to keep my head above the water. Fortunately (or unfortunately), I didn't even realize how down I was until a few weeks after the colic magically disappeared, I got my husband back, and my fog lifted. I'm not going to beat myself up for not being fully present during that time. I did the best I could. Suffice it to say, we're all feeling better now, and I am finally getting to know my son. And I have to tell you, he is delightful! What a charmer! I just can't get enough of this cutie pie!

His looks have really changed since he was born. He looks like me! Well, parts of me anyway. What an ego trip! I love it. His favorite thing is to stare at me. And stare. And stare and stare and stare, until I look at him, and then he breaks out a huge grin. And a laugh. I'm telling you, I feel like a rockstar when I am in his presence. I am the MOST fascinating person in the world to him. He can't get enough of me. My favorite time of day is in the morning, after he wakes up and nurses, and before Wyatt wakes up. We just hang out in my bed, flirting and laughing and smiling at each other. I'm always tired (NOT a morning person), but I love having that time with him. It totally makes the months of crying (mine) and screaming (his) worth it.

In addition to being perfectly adorable, he is very strong. This kid is going to be walking a month from now. Okay, of course not, but he is very strong. And determined. He rolls all over the place, stands every chance he gets. He is ticklish, and has such a silly belly laugh. I know this is turning into an obnoxious proud mama post. I'm sorry. Its not like he has turned out to be an easy baby, far from it. He is still a challenge. But his sweetness and cuddliness are shining through now, and I'm finally in a place where I can enjoy him. So indulge me while I brag and gush.

I'm so thankful for my little Micah Bean. I love that kid so much it hurts. I can't get enough of him. We had a rough start, but I wouldn't trade a minute. He is the perfect addition to our family. I love you Micah!

And the winner is...

Lillian! Your prize...

Thanks everyone else for playing. Jake was Space Ghost for Halloween. At his work everyone was calling him "Yellow Batman." Um, close enough, I guess.

Heather MHM, you and Kurt think alike. He suggested that Wyatt be mini-Jimmy for Halloween. Next year, when I get my act together, I am totally making them matching Jimmy Neutron costumes.

Heather OD, your comment cracked me up. Thank you.

Aaaaargh, Baby!

Halloween 2009 consisted of me taking the boys to Jake's work on Friday for their Halloween party, taking the party bus to the ward Halloween party and trunk-or-treat, and then pooping out on actual Halloween, during which we ate pizza and Wyatt slept. We got one group of trick-or-treaters, who got handfuls of candy from me. It wasn't really so much generosity on my part, its just that I don't like the sour AirHeads, and I feel bad throwing out perfectly good candy. We didn't take Wyatt out because our neighborhood is not really a good trick-or-treating neighborhood, and we didn't want to drive out and find one that is. Bad parents.

Micah was a pumpkin (look familiar? Wyatt was the same thing in '07), and Wyatt was a pirate. Not my first choice, but it turned out cute. I totally forgot about Halloween costumes until like, Wednesday, so we rushed out to find something, only to find...nothing. This costume was almost literally the only thing on the shelves. Except for Star Wars stuff, but honestly, I've never watched Star Wars, so I didn't even know what it was all supposed to be. Anyway, the guy who rang us up gave us this big lecture "Absolutely no refunds, exchanges, complaining, litigating, etc., etc.," and I didn't really listen, because I was just happy to have SOMETHING to dress up Wyatt in. Except then I got home and realized the pants, pirate symbol, belt, and something else, I can't remember now, sword maybe?, were not in the bag. Fantastic. I pay a ridiculous amount of money for this crap cheap costume, and half of it is missing. So the next day I went to the fabric store and got material. But my sewing machine is broken. To sum up the rest, I made Wyatt's pants with hemming tape, velcro and staples. My domestic abilities are bringing you to your knees, no? From far away, it looked good, but if you got within 10 feet, there were weird puckers, fabric bits sticking out, and lots of fraying. I was so worried his pants were going to split in half every time he took a step or sat down. I had to follow very close behind to keep disaster at bay. I'm sure everyone just thought I was a very protective mother.

The kids were a big hit at Jake's work. The patients and the staff loved seeing them. We scored lots of candy and kisses (Jake said I did a good job at hiding my panic every time someone grabbed a face, hand, or foot for a kiss. Actually he said there was terror in my eyes. I thought I did a good job at hiding it, guess not).

Wyatt has been hopped up on sugar and acting like a terrorist all weekend. Candy is almost gone, and then hopefully normal behavior will resume.

Pictures:

I will send you ten dollars if you can guess who Jake is dressed up as. I won't, actually, but try to guess anyway.

This was taken on the roof of Jake's facility. Nice view, eh?

Drumroll Please!

You asked for it...and I have to give the people what they want...

Our elevator! It sounds a lot cooler than it actually is. I guess the guy who built this house had a friend who was in a wheelchair, and he got a free elevator from somewhere (apparently there are free elevators in circulation?), so he put it in this house. Of course. My favorite part is the "in case of emergency, use stairs" sign. And there is a phone jack. In case you get stuck and need to call the fire department.

These were taken from my iphone, so that explains the quality. I can't figure out how to get video from my camcorder onto my computer (I've been told its quite simple, but no one has offered to give me a tutorial yet!).

Weird lighting is a theme throughout the house. One example:

Our family room, dining room, kitchen:

Don't judge. We're still unpacking and arranging.

We have an empty living room downstairs, so I want to get new seating for upstairs and move this stuff downstairs. That will be awhile though, we need an influx of cash-o-la. In the meantime, our downstairs sits empty, thus, no pictures.

Hosanna Hosanna We've Found Our New Home

Moved. Did it. Don't want to do it again for a long time. We are mostly settled in. Actually, not true. We have the basics done. And I am too lazy to unpack the rest. So it sits in the garage. I'll get to it later.

A few people have asked me to post pictures of the house on this blog, and I won't be doing that. Since its public, I'm just not comfortable posting pictures of my house here. Maybe I'll put them up on facebook later, or if you REALLY want to see pictures, I'll email them. Wait, let me clarify. I won't post pictures of the outside of the house, but later when I get the inside done, I'll post those pictures.

The house we are living in is kind of strange. The guys who owns it built it himself, many years ago, and there are a lot of quirks. I don't even know how to describe it. And not like good quirks necessarily. Some are good quirks. Like an elevator. What. You don't have an elevator? Anyway, the weird quirks are worth it for the location.

(I am having a really hard time typing today! I'm having to backspace like every other letter.)

The weather has been lovely. We had a big storm the first few days, but since then, it has been sunny and clear and beautiful! Our house is just a two minute walk down to the beach and the Marine Reserve, with huge tidepools. The boys and I walk down there pretty much every day. It's awesome. Jake says its like living at the aquarium. We love it! I love seeing the ocean every time I look out my windows, and hearing the waves when I go outside. Very soothing.

Starfish...
"...crab with two clamping claws"

We went to the Half Moon Bay Pumpkin Festival, which was so fun! Tons of vendors with beautiful artwork, crafts, and fantastic food. Usually at these things, you get the usual corndogs, funnel cake, pizza, blah blah blah, but we had marinated artichoke hearts, braised brussel sprouts, fried calamari, pumpkin rolls, pumpkin bread, pumpkin cookies, pumpkin ice cream, clam chowder, all manner of sausages...and that wasn't even the half of it. SO GOOD.

Above: Erin with fried calamari, Wy with pumpkin ice cream cone. I do feed my child foods other than ice cream, although you might not think so from reading this blog.

Below: Wyatt eyeing dad's garlic-rosemary-artichoke heart-deliciousness, two seconds away from grabbing a handful. He is such a good eater. I love him.

Our new ward is pretty great. It is small and spread out, but so friendly! We felt like we were royalty! Pretty much every person in the ward came up to welcome us and meet us, and I got a standing ovation and pumped-fist cheers in Relief Society. Seriously. I've never felt so welcome anywhere. We are excited to be here. I know we will be put to work here; its good to feel needed!

Hollie's Wedding!

Congratulations to my sister-in-law Hollie and her new husband Matt Gille! They were married on September 25 in the Houston Texas temple. Yes, I know that was several weeks ago, but I just got my camera back from Jake, and wasn't able to blog about this until now. Sorry.

It was a wild and crazy trip for us. The boys and I flew up to San Francisco to meet Jake, and then the next day we all flew out to Texas together. We stayed with his Grandma Beaman for three days, flew back to SF together, and then I flew back to So Cal with the boys. Yikes. I don't recommend flying alone with two kids under two. Not fun.

It was a beautiful wedding. Hollie looked GORGEOUS, and they make such a beautiful couple. We were so glad we got to be there, we just wish we could have stayed a little longer!

So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Adieu

Tomorrow is moving day. Feeling a little sad, in a sentimental kind of way. Its rare, but this feeling always shows up when I move. Normally, I'm the kind of person who loves change. Even in this situation, when I would rather stay than go, I can't help but be excited for the change. I love moving for that reason. I know its weird. I'm pretty sure its genetic, passed on to me from my Granddad. But on moving day I always get a little nostalgic, a little sad to leave behind my life in this place. Once I get on the road, the feelings will fade. One thing I have learned over the years is to embrace feelings in the moment, so indulge me while I journal this.

Erin Fun Fact: I LOVE making lists. Love it. It brings me joy and relieves anxiety. It calms me down and get me excited all at once. Its like Diet Coke, but without the subsequent gas and bloating. Right now as I type this, I can see no less than 8 lists that are magneted (its a word now) to the fridge, and I know of several more sprinkled throughout the house. Thus...

Things I won't miss about living here:

1. The Santa Ana winds
2. The ____________ (fill in the expletive) 91 freeway
3. HOT, DRY summers
4. Traffic at every hour, every day (see #2 above)
5. Living without my husband

Things I will miss about living here:

1. Cheap pedicures
2. Disneyland
3. Wearing sandals year round
4. The lovely beaches where one can wear a swimming suit, and even get in the water, if one wanted to
5. Multiple political points of view
6. Sunshine
7. Affordable housing
8. Wide parking stalls
9. Strong church presence
10. Wonderful, loving, supportive family and friends

Yeah, I'm going to miss this place terribly. Don't get me wrong, I am excited to move up north. I really am. I mean, I still have my reservations, but overall, I am feeling excited and positive. I'm looking forward to what the future holds for me and for my family. I know that the Lord has guided us to the place where we are at this time. I have faith that He has a plan for us. It has been a bumpy road, and MANY times along the way, we've looked at each other and said "what have we done?! We just can't do this anymore!" But that's what trials of faith are all about: trusting in the Lord, seeking his guidance, acting on answers to prayer, taking leaps into the darkness. Not that I think the road is going to be smooth from here on out, I know it won't be. Our journey is far from over. But I know we are being guided, our hands are being held, and I am grateful for that.

So here I am, scared but full of hope. And dreading the 9 hour car trip tomorrow with the boys... :)